来一篇吧

惯性礼拜日 update? 哈哈哈哈。。。原来 monday blue, effect 那么大。。。

其实只是看了部电影, 然后昨天跟兄弟到云顶吹风, 聊天。。。才发现, 其实我对生活, 好像有了一点点不一样的看法。。。

以前我非常享受平庸, 所以咧, 好像都很乏味。。。最近我却一直在想, 要是有那么一个人, 你那么的重视, 为什么你不去为你们之间创造那特别, 无法取代的回忆?

平庸乏味本是我的天性, 但是却在里头蕴藏着风流不羁, 也许这就是天蝎的神秘, 因为天蝎本身, 也不知道, 自己到底是什么。。。

乏味的生活, 会让人厌倦, 下一次, 我会让平庸, 点缀上不羁的野性, 悠柔的浪漫, 好让平凡里, 有一些火花。。。让淡淡的白开水, 有着甜丝丝的味道。。。

让我平凡的一切, 变得一点都不平凡, 因为。。。我懂了。。。

Dropbox Images

It couldnt be denied that dropbox is an awesome apps, needless to say the auto uploading to cloud function. And due to changing of fon, I still yet to equip my new fon wit the Dropbox app, and few days ago, I tend to remember getting it back so I downloaded it. Once I got it in my few, of cuz it took some times to upload all my existing photo to the cloud, while doing so, I look through the old albums for some auto uploaded photo, n tadaaa~ Memories strike again... I saw photos of us, which I forgot the existence, I saw screenshots I took of sweet msgs which I used to send it to you, and of cuz the reason tat brings up this post... Our arguments, u might not realised we doesnt really argue when we r in the undefined relationship, coz U know I doesnt like to argue, I always choose to keep quite, and let things pass. All the msgs I screenshot, represent the few months where we quarrel the most, on anything and everything, and each and every time, I fight back, I scolded you, you scolded me back, and the main reason of all these, is Him, the Mr J... That moment, is the gloomiest and saddest moment of all, we been into fights, we said we hate each others, we said life could be better if all these end between us, those words, those language... it's so hurtful, till the extent whereby juz merely reading bak those messages, causes a watery eyes of mine, my emotions got tense, and my eyes close unintentionally due to the heart could take those words once more... And yes, it's tat hurts... It hurts so much that it leaves an unforgettable marks even after so so long, I still feel the heartache just by reading back the messages where we quarrel,it hurts so much that I can literally fell the disappointment I felt at tat moment when you said u wanted to forgive... It hurts so much... Too much... And all of the above, just get me another sleepless night and half day of EL coz I couldnt wake up in the morning today... Hahahahaha~ I doesnt feel like writing a post of it at the vry beginning, but just in case u know, one day, when I hav amnesia, and this sites is still on while dropbox is still accessible, I know where to find my memories, some memories which I treasure most...

今天是 792015

我的周末, 变化都特别的大幅度, 有时空闲得不得了, 有时充足的不得了, 但是相同的是, 我都不喜欢浪费这些唯一属于自己的时间, 闲时, 就休息个够, 忙时, 就忙个够。。。所以我每个星期日的晚上呢, 都会习惯性的迟睡, 今晚。。。也不例外。。。

没事干, 开了开电脑, 看了看照片。。。是, 是上一次旅行的照片, 看着看着, 不禁地感叹了, 原来那一次的旅行, 是最后一次, 一这样的形态一起。。。遗憾的是, 有些事情只是回忆, 依然没办法, 一觉地, 拥抱到天亮, 像是注定般的, 错过了一切。。。

嗨。。。近来的你, 好吗? 好久不见了, 不知道是天意, 还是人为, 我们总没机会见面。。。你, 过得还好吗?

我很好, 才发觉, 差一个礼拜, 就五个月了, 惨痛的接受现实, 有五个月了, 但其实时间比我想像中的慢呢。。。

会发觉, 真的不一样了, 少了不踏实的感觉, 少了忧虑, 少了陪伴, 生活突然的, 像少了很多东西。。。从来只相信事在人为的我啊, 竟然去问神了, 他的回答啊, 其实有让我吃惊, 原来啊, 孤僻这事儿, 是与生俱来的。。。哈哈哈哈哈哈。。。放心, 问神, 也只是失了方向, 想找个安心什么的, 我依然是比较相信我的能力, 终究会有成果。。。那感情嘛, 就还好, 因为我觉得我的孤僻, 不适合有 commitment, 所以都没目标的。。。

其实最近啊, 都蛮迷茫的, 就事业啊, 都有点 offtrack 了, 很多事情都已经没办法控制, 也许是项目都变大变多, 没办法控制的事越来越多, 就变得越来越不喜欢上班。。。明年, 也许会考虑找点喜欢的事来做, 趁年轻, 试试看去闯点什么的。。。

你呢? 最近。。。都干点啥了?

下雨天

其实从我看到歌词的那一天起，它就变成了我 playlist 里，一直 repeat 的歌。。。 我问，你说又怎样？ 真的没怎样。。。 就其实想知道，是不是。。。

这是?

最可怜的感情, 是暧昧不清, 有时很实, 有时很虚, 可能双方都只是想为寂寞找个寄托。。。剪不断, 理还乱。。。

为什么我都遇见这样的。。。

I am not Ready

I Knew Im not Ready when I neither felt happy or sweet when she started the Babe, Dear, Bae title thingy but rather annoyed n stress n not feel like replying at all...

Please keep it slow girl, else... I will just leave...

我从不相信感情可以无中生有, 至少对我来说不能。。。

Vanished World

You were rushing your ways to have a glance of my world, u tried so hard and you finally found a way... After u got the whole image of how my world looks like, you turned around and left after finding it wasn't interesting as you thought it would be, and without you noticing... The world vanished as you leave...

其实

其实, 能不能也有个人, 能心疼我。。。

狂欢后遗症

我每天说, 我有狂欢后遗症, 却没说过它是什么。。。其实它是一个很简单的东西, 它每一次都会出现在狂欢夜后, 玩得越 high, 感觉越深。。。

每一次的狂欢, 都会让肾上腺素飙高, 头脑会非常的亢奋, 自然的它就会以为你很开心, 那当你睡觉时, 由于头脑还处于亢奋的状态, 你就会一直的发梦, 就因为它觉得你很开心, 就会让你梦见那些开心, 现实中已经不在料的事, 那种就想一辈子待在那里, 不想梦醒的感觉, 无比的痛。。。

早上起来, 那感觉是悲得不得料, 不用我说, 你也该知道我梦见什么了吧, 原来可以接受, 不代表可以面对。。。梦时的感觉, 好熟悉, 好熟悉的, 陌生人。。。

总是想让你知道, 我曾经做过什么, 是什么让我不再想做。。。然后慢慢的, 又觉得, 还有关系吗? 这就是那天的 "没什么。。。", 有些东西, 收着, 对谁都好。。。

密码应该还记得吧？

Key in password

4142015

又来了, 一股寒流, 从腰部, 慢慢传到头顶, 以致鸡皮疙瘩, 头皮发麻。。。我知道, 这是我情绪失控的前夕, 不常发生, 但是我对它无比熟悉, 因为它的出现, 都代表着刻骨的记忆。。。

All these while, I'd imagining this day to happen, and I tot tat I could easily cope with it as it happened in my head, it happened in there for numbers of times, I start to feel numb of it, and yet, when it finally happened, I knew tat is it not as I thought, I had a mix feelings of it, I got so sad, tat I wanted to cry so badly, till I couldn't do it...